Following a lifetime journey of transformation
13 Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, 14 I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. - Philippians 3:13-14
It's not easy to release or stop doing something you have been doing for years, especially when you benefit from that thing you are doing. It is easy to get used to something, but to give it up and keep on going to where you know you have to go is way harder in practice than in theory.
Can you imagine Jesus' big decision; to give up heaven to come to earth, really? why?
Jesus came to earth to save us, and He could have done it without all the humbling process he had to go through, He is God. But He came and was born below what was considered normal conditions; born in a manger. And at the end was murdered at the cross. But He knew that He had to do His Father's will, and He endured suffering for us.
Next time we face difficulties, let us not forget that God knows what we feel, and what we need. So don't think too much, but pray and let God guide you, He knows what is best for you.